Monday, January 27, 2014

Book Review: Your Band is Called What???

Think about all the great bands over the decades. The bands that are now legendary, and have had long careers, and are now icons in heavy metal. Bands like Judas Priest, Iron Maiden, Metallica, Megadeth, Dio, Black Sabbath, and the list of legendary bands goes on and on. But, ask yourself, what do all those bands have in common other than longevity and amazing music? (minus a bad album or two..<St. Anger, Lulu> ) I'll tell you, but let me first ask you a question. How far would Iron Maiden have made it if they had called themselves 'Medieval Impaling Bridge Ornament?' They might have gotten as far as the bands in the book I read called 'Your Band is Called What? 101 Band Names I Never Thought I'd Type or Say' by Romeo Rodriguez, which is available for download on Amazon for 99 cents. The book is coming soon. So, the answer to my question is on top of great music, they also had great names.

Once you start reading this collection of the worst band names...REAL band names ever conceived, you won't be able to put it down. Author, Romeo Rodriguez does a great job of critiquing these band names, and you will be laughing hysterically most of the time. Some (very few) of the names are awesome, but most of them make me wonder exactly what kind of drugs these guys were on to think that they would ever attract a record label with a name like that.

I have been in a bunch of bands myself. The band name was something carefully chosen to represent our music and ourselves as the band. I would never dream of calling my band "Anal Vapor Ooze Queens on Acid." While I just made that one up, as far as I know, I'd bet that A: There is already a band with that name. Or, B: A grindcore death metal band will read this blog and swipe it. If you want this name, go ahead. Its yours. Please don't credit me with it. But rest assured, if you do swipe that name, Rodriguez will list you in a future volume of this book if he decides to write more volumes.

Another thing he touches on is the bands who have names that aren't necessarily bad, just super long. They are rare to attract the record labels as well. The only ones I can think of off the top of my head with long names who also made it big are The Red Hot Chili Peppers and They Might Be Giants. And, compared to some of the ones listed in the book, those two aren't very long at all. I'm not going to drop any of the names he listed because I want you to buy the book; But there are quite a few long ones that are actually pretty good, but just too long. However, one in particular having to do with a large moose was a very cool name, but the writeup that Rodriguez did for it had me bawling because I was laughing so hard.

Something else that happens frequently is that the author will talk about a name, and say that the band is very good. Most of the time, the bands are worse than the names, but there are a few where its a shame that they decided that picking a name that would shock, nauseate, or offend was more important to them than getting good gigs, record deals, or even a girlfriend. What decent girl would be proud to say her boyfriend was the bass player from 'Bleeding Herpes Discharge in your Breakfast Cereal?' None I would want to hook up with, that's for sure. Once again, I made this one up, but it could easily be in this book. If you like it, have at it, but I don't want credit.

So, do yourself a favor, and buy this book. You will enjoy it, and won't be able to put it down. Its also a book that your friends will want to read as well. But, don't let them borrow your copy. Just let them get on your computer, go to Amazon, and have them download their OWN copy. Like I said, its only 99 cents.

In closing, I can't think of much more to say about this book, other than I enjoyed it, and I recommend it. Right now, I am going to go look up some of these bands that Romeo Rodriguez says were good, and give them a listen. Who knows, we may have some of the good ones on the Will and Thunder Show <Ca-ching!> at some point.

What's this? I just got an email alert. Upcoming concert in my area...Lets see...It says at the Rusty Nail Pub, the Screaming Satanic Pythons with Aids and Gangrene are coming in concert with I Hate Carrying Pianos Upstairs With an Idiot, along with local opening act, The Vomit Finger! It also says the date is pending until the health department is able to complete their investigation of the bar.

I'm getting a tetanus shot, and I'm there.

No comments:

Post a Comment